I feel like each week in the mission field is a mini life. With the rollercoaster of emotions and the amount of learning and growing that takes place it is truly incredible!
I've been struggling lately to know how to feel like Im doing enough, am I truly being a servant of my Heavenly Father? Or is anything at all that I'm doing Helping Others Come Unto Christ (Missionary Purpose). This question weighs on my mind constantly as I try to do everything to the best of my abilities. Unfortunatley my selfcritical thoughts always seem to overwhelm me and end up breaking my spirit. I feel inadequate, like nothing is changing or as though my best effort just isn't good enough. Im seeking to be perfect rather then focusing on being a little better each day. This stress to be a perfect everthing finally drove me to a breaking point this week. Luckily with the help of Elder Ashiby we were able to come up with 2 goals to Help Makord Larsen just be a little better this week. :)
1. Don't be Self-Critical! The spirit will never speak to you through negativity. This life is beautiful, find joy in the journey :) write down a list of things you do really well. we all have amazing talents from our Father in Heaven. Let's recognize them and give ourself some credit! We are all pretty cool people with special unique abilities :)
2. Slow Down! My mind is constantly going 100 MPH thinking about the work, how I could've done this and that better, or how I let this person down because I couldn't share a thought in spanish, and then just a million other things that bring stress into my life. I feel like if I keep this stress up I'm going to come home bald! One that's helped me slow down is focusing only on the next thing right in front of me, or in baseball terms taking it 1 pitch at a time.
I'm so grateful for the opportunity I have to be here serving a mission. It's definitely not easy, but it is teaching me things I never could have imagined. One other aspect that's helped me find joy in the mission field is loving the little things. The sunsets down here are incredible! I miss the mountains but seeing these every night isn't too shabby :)
Thank you for all of your support and prayers they are always felt. I love and miss you all so much. Keep going relying on our Savior Jesus Christ everyday to get a little better.
"It's good to try and be perfect, but it's better to be better" Elder Ashby
Love, Elder Larsen